Wow

Two Wednesdays running, I've fasted, for approx 21 hours each time.  First time was water only, second time the very occasional tea/weak coffee, flushed with lots of water.  (I got a slight headache just after lunch, really, the experts are right, avoid caffeine when you're fasting.  If I hadn't had plenty of water as well, I think it may have been worse)

I don't know why, I just felt, with recent discussions with the pastor, it was the right thing to do in my circumstance.

Then, a little while after lunchtime yesterday, just when I was thinking "why am I fasting at all, shouldn't I have some sort of purpose?" a revelation hit me right in between the eyeballs.  It isn't especially new, but it became real.

Do you ever get that?  You might become over-familiarised with various passages of scripture, and you become anethetised to them, you know they are true, but they aren't real to you.

The testimony that I will probably share on Sunday, I won't share here.  That is because it is linked to my employer, and I don't want to state who they are on the blog (and the testimony will make it obvious who they are, even if I don't say the name) - I don't want to link blog and employer in that way, for various reasons.

I still have a thorn in my flesh, and I got a phone call yesterday with a suggestion of how to alleviate it.  I still have concerns for the church's future and my future.   I still panic, I'm still overly anal about certain matters, but God said to me very clearly yesterday:

Child, you are Mine.

That's special.