Moving in a mysterious way

Having decided to generally "back off" this week because the wounds are still too painful, Saturday evening my thoughts turned once again to church, and where to go on the Sunday morning.

I really didn't want to go to the church I went to a couple of weeks ago.  There's something missing...

All the same, an "impetus" got me out of the front door yesterday, despite rain, wind and cold.  If asked, I guessed I would have said I would have felt guilty all week had I not gone somewhere.  Fear of God does that to you.

I ended up in a church that was very small indeed, there were 8 of us there in total.  But God is God.  There was a link with one of the members.  She thought she had missed the monthly outreach, and oh yes, her friend would like to come to, and maybe a few others...

Two, maybe more, people who will be coming to the outreach, who wouldn't have come if I had notturned up in their church that morning.  God was so in that detail.  And it was a Spirit driving me out in the inclement weather.

Have I found the church I need?  Well, I still don't know.  The message was good (and very apt for me, well a good reminder, about moving mountains)  They need a worship leader (there's a surprise!) but is it the place for me?  My attitude is very strange - you would think I would be saying - worship leading??!!  When do I start??!!  But no...

I was thinking about it later, after a conversation with the outreach leader, that the regular WL is still very much Out Of Action and will be for some time.  It saddened me, but I thought, I can't do church and the outreach, it nearly killed me in the summer.

Remember the butterfly?

I shall be a butterfly.  I will flit about from church to church.  I know where I'm going next week, and I have plans for the following couple of weeks to Christmas.  God has somewhere for me I'm thinking, but as long as I get fellowship, and the gospel, that is my food for the week and I will be happy.

The WL will come later.  After healing.  After prayer.  Maybe God has something even more special.

Another week, another church

I went to my friends' church today, about 50 miles away on the Wirral.  What was unexpected was the worship; an all male group and mostly old choruses, when I had been led to believe they did more modern stuff.

Then one friend said to the other - "I think that's the first time I've been there where the worship was made up of old choruses" - must have seen me coming!  But I noticed, in contrast, the enthusiasm of the group of 30-40 for these old choruses against the Anglicans of last week with modern hymns and no enthusiasm.

God re-iterating to me that it isn't just what you sing and play.

I was finding it difficult to worship; I'm fighting a cold so my voice was rubbish, the WL insisting on playing everything in the "usual" key (so far too high for me), and some of the old choruses stabbed, even ripped at my memory of what was, what it could have been...

...I am being stupidly sentimental and maybe morbidly pessimistic, but despite pretty speeches of "it will be good to have a holiday from all this" - deep down, the WL in me needs to know when.  God spoke to me from Hebrews last night.

Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward.  For ye have need of patience, that, after ye have done the will of God, ye might receive the promise. Hebrews 10:35-36 (KJV 1611)

I cannot know the reward until after I have done God's will, and I need patience, in fact it's that word hoopomonay again - endurance, patient continuance - not really a strongpoint of mine.

And sometimes we need to drop everything, re-prioritise, and move on, marking His footsteps.

Friends

Must.  Be.  Patient.  Timing is everything, and I am so guilty of jumping in when the timing is all wrong.

Nearly there with one of the meetings though.  Intriguing that not only do I want to see them, they want to see me.

I don't know if this is some insight they've had into the situation, or maybe there is something very very important they have to say to me as well.

So.  Even more reason to be patient.  Double prayers over the weekend.

Courts of the King

Today was a Good Day.

It was a God Day.

It started with words of encouragement and really good worship in this sorta locum WL activity I've found myself in.  Someone pointed out (and liked the fact) that it was made up of old choruses.  But, my gosh, when 3 of them have them singing in tongues and you feel like an ocean wave you just know the Spirit is moving.

At the beginning of the proceedings someone reminded me that if it is just one on one, i.e. just me worshipping God - sobeit.  Don't worry if not one person is joining in.  Worship God.  It wasn't until the 3rd verse of the second chorus that I started to settle, and worship.

Oh wow, it felt good today.  It's the way worship should be - that I feel topped up, invigorated - and utterly exhausted.  But to feel spiritually improved and tired is a good thing, believe me.  I feel that I've given God 110%.

My spirit fervently prays that the person I'm "locum"ing for comes back soon.  In fact, it would be best for them to be there as soon as possible - for their own spiritual health.

I am so going to enjoy this whilst it lasts though.  Thank You.  This has all come at exactly the right time.

Timing

God's timing really is incredible.

I remember someone saying that, sometimes, it feels that God acts about 1 minute to midnight - forget the 11th hour - and they say it's great that He intervened, but couldn't He have done it a little sooner, rather than shave more years off their life?

On the other hand - they said - any sooner would have been wrong (you might end up taking Him for granted) - God's timing is impeccable.

Such as it was today.  I was wandering around the supermarket thinking about a certain situation and certain causes attached to it.  Then I hear a voice greeting me - no, not an angel of the Lord, but close.  Someone very close to that situation who I had been meaning to speak to but I thought were away until next week.

He had made sure we were in that supermarket at the same time so that the foundation could be laid.

Absolutely perfect timing.