I didn't lead worship this morning. I think everyone around me saw it coming apart from me, and I would have gone ahead with leading anyway, except for a phone call last night...
...Bossman telling me not to lead this morning.
It's the first time it's happened, and it is somewhat...irking...if that's a word. I mean, I have taken a break through choice (although I maintain my hand would have been forced if I hadn't) and had an "unexpected" break for a special interlude, but never actually been told directly...don't...or else...
At least it wasn't as if I am spiritually messed up (well, that's up for debate actually) - or at least, not the reason for my sudden temporary redundancy, no, I'm still unwell, my voice is terrible and we have a special day next Sunday, for which I have to be well.
Still irking though.
Still, the service had to be cut short for one reason and another, the message was rather long (though I did get something out of it) and what the worship told me this morning is that if I am doubting that I am needed in that church, I should dismiss it. A group needs a leader and it didn't have one this morning...
...which makes me think I need a second. And pretty soon, in case this happens again.
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